itsnotmymind: (buffy crying)
I re-watched Innocence yesterday. Still a powerful story. It really brings home to me, though, how Angel coming back to life in S3 undermines the story. She kills him, and the very next episode he's in the credits? I know when the show first aired there was a few months in between seasons where viewers thought he might stay dead, but even still - that's not that long a time. We only see a few episodes of Buffy trying to grieve and move on before he's back, for a whole season of pointless on-and-off romance. And while I was never huge fan of Jenny or Kendra, I am bitter that the white male is in the credits the episode after he dies while the women of color die and stay dead.

And think how powerful it would be if Angel had stayed dead, or if he had come back after a few seasons instead of right away. Yeah, I know, we would have missed out on AtS. But for Buffy's story, it would have been a vast improvement. What if Buffy really did have to enter adulthood having killed her great love? Not temporarily, but permanently (or apparently permanently)? It would have rendered his death and the S2 story line so much more meaningful.
itsnotmymind: (daredevil)
During my first watch of Luke Cage, I noticed not long before he died that Cottonmouth had become a pretty pathetic villain, always on the run. I thought Mariah should replace him as the arch-villain. I felt vindicated when she killed him. In some ways it was a shame, since their relationship was just starting to get interesting to me, with the flashbacks to their upbringing.

But Mariah did not become the arch-villain. At least not this season.

It's a little over halfway through the season before we even meet Diamondback. Plenty of time to spend trying to suss out who, exactly, is supposed to be our biggest bad.

And the reveal of Willis Stryker was, I felt, ultimately disappointing.

I am your brother )
itsnotmymind: (buffy 1)
Sorted using the links here.

Warning: It takes awhile to sort all your favorite episodes and characters.

Favorite Buffyverse characters and BtVS episodes )
itsnotmymind: (buffy & dawn swing)
Icon table created with [livejournal.com profile] sql_girl's Icon Table Generator.

Feel free to take, but please comment and credit!

13 Icons from Spiral-The Gift )
itsnotmymind: (buffy/spike as you were)
Re-reading [livejournal.com profile] gabrielleabelle's old meta posts in good for inspiring BtVS meta from me.

Gabrielleabelle argued that the Buffy/Angel relationship subverts itself. This is what I picked up on - on a less articulate level - the first time I watched Buffy. I was disappointed when Angel got his soul back and seemed immediately and magically transformed into his good self (when he gets back his soul in Becoming 2, he doesn't remember his soulless period). It shoved the subversion back in the box.

Vampires with and without souls )
itsnotmymind: (sam & dean metamorphosis)
I spent this morning thinking about hurtful lines from my favorites TV shows. Things that characters say to the people they love that are devastating. I picked out my current favorites from each of my favorite TV shows (Torchwood, Buffy, Supernatural, Jessica Jones). I'm sure there's particularly devastating lines that I've forgotten, but here's what I have now:
Ow )
itsnotmymind: (buffy & faith)
Still re-reading [livejournal.com profile] gabrielleabelle's Buffy polls, and I've gotten to her poll on This Year's Girl.

Her third question jumped out at me: "Looking back at events up till this episode, do you think Buffy had done everything that could be reasonably expected of her to reach out to Faith?" There's a lot of discussion in the comments about whether Buffy did enough to help Faith, and what should realistically have been expected of her, Faith-wise.

The question itself demonstrates for me a problem with how fandom talks about the Faith/Buffy relationship. Because no one ever asks, "Did Faith do enough to help Buffy?" Buffy can be condescending with Faith, and she is the senior slayer - but the end of the day she's Faith's equal and peer, not her superior. It's not even clear if she's older or younger than Faith. Buffy isn't Faith's watcher, mother, or therapist. It's not fair to either girl to expect Buffy to take responsibility for Faith as if Faith were a wayward child (which, I mean, she kinda is, but not in relation to Buffy). Buffy had her problems, too, and if she is responsible for Faith, shouldn't Faith also be responsible for her?
itsnotmymind: (buffy/faith kiss)
I've been re-reading the comments on [livejournal.com profile] gabrielleabelle's episode polls for season three, and stumbled on a tumblr post about the season, and that's got me thinking about why Buffy S3 is tied with S7 for my least favorite of the full-length seasons. On an episode by episode basis, I would say S3 is stronger (I LOVE Earshot), but S3 is the season where I temporarily lost my emotional investment in the show, and here's why:

Nothing happens.

You'd think stabbing someone into a coma would change something )
itsnotmymind: (Default)
We almost certainly don't see Faith's first murder. I even see fans who take for granted that Faith only ever murdered one person (the volcanologist), but in fact we see Faith murder on camera for the first time in Choices. She seems very cool about it, giving the impression that this isn't the first time she's intentionally ended a human life. Even looking at Graduation Day Part 1 in isolation, there's no reason to believe this is Faith's first murder, and plenty of reason to believe it isn't. Again, she's very cool, and she tells the professor "I'll make it quick," as if she knows what she'd doing. When Buffy see the newspaper article about it, she immediately knows Faith committed the murder. She explains that the murder is "One of her pieces. I recognize the brush work." "Pieces", as if Faith has had a few of them. Later in the episode, during their fight, Buffy says to Faith, "All that killing, you afraid to die?" The line certainly implies that there was more than one murder and one accidental kill. The assumption of some fans that Faith only murdered one person has no basis in the text.

It is interesting to me that Faith's first accidental kill is a huge deal - a whole episode devoted to the immediate fall-out - but her first murder is possibly not even referenced or shown on screen. When did Faith cross that line?
itsnotmymind: (Default)
I have thoughts - and feelings, on Spike and Dean Winchester, on the roles they play. I am not the first person to note that there are similarities between Spike's devotion to Buffy (and previously Dru) and Dean's to Sam.

On love )
itsnotmymind: (Default)
What are the limits of crossroads demons in SPN?

Prior to AHBL2, I do not think we saw any demon bring back the dead. Dean was dying. Julie (Evan's wife) in Crossroad Blues was dying.

But Sam was dead.

Yet there must be limits on demon deals. No one’s sold their soul for world peace, have they? I feel like once we were told that sometimes demons can only do certain things if someone makes a deal. Like Anya? Like vengeance demons? I’m not sure.

In The Wish, we see Anya completely alter reality, but I don't think we ever see anything like that from a vengeance demon again. The implication are never address. Can crossroads demons alter realty?

Stop Me

Jan. 15th, 2017 09:31 am
itsnotmymind: (Default)
An exchange from Buffy vs. Dracula:

Buffy: Stay away from me.
Dracula: Are you afraid I will bite you? Slayer, that's why you came.
Buffy: No. Last night ... it's not gonna happen again.
Dracula: Stop me. Stake me.
Buffy: I...Any minute now.

“Stop me.” Shades of Buffy/Spike?

A Buffy/Spike shipper who had more sympathy for Spike in S6 once suggested, discussing Wrecked, that maybe people thought Spike had power by his sexiness, and mocked the idea. But as I have discussed before, it's not sexiness. It's shame.

Something interesting that I've never seen anyone comment on: In Beneath You, when Spike starts taunting Buffy, goes into vamp face, claims he hasn’t changed, he references the balcony. Seeing Red isn’t as awful as Dead Things, for me, because while Spike tries to overpower Buffy physically in SR, he is not playing on her shame. He’s not using her self-loathing.
itsnotmymind: (Default)
One argument that irritates me from many fans who believe SPN's Amy Pond should have been killed is how much importance they place on the fact that she killed recently. Specifically, Amy kill recently, Benny killed a long time ago, therefore Benny should be allowed to live with no punishment or restrictions, and Amy should be killed. I have no problem with the recent-ness of a monster's killed being a factor in how they were killed, but the entire judgment? That makes no sense. In the real world, there is no statue of limitations on murder, and there's a reason for that.

Statue of Limitations )
itsnotmymind: (Default)
Icon table created with [Bad username or unknown identity: sql_girl.livejournal.com]'s Icon Table Generator.

Comments are love <3.

Feel free to take, just comment and credit.

10 Icons from Intervention and Tough Love )
itsnotmymind: (Default)
I have occasionally thought about how both Spike and Ruby use Buffy and Sam’s shame about their sexual relationship against them.

There are strong differences, of course. Spike just wants Buffy to love him. In many ways, he follows her lead, but his lack of soul makes it difficult for him to gauge when he’s abusing her and when he isn’t. He’s an emotional predator, and we see that on the balcony in Dead Things. She’s ashamed of what they do together, so he uses it to isolate her from her friends, to convince her that she is bad and dirty and has no choice but to be with him. He deliberately crushes her happiness and exacerbates her feelings and self-loathing. He’s impulsive about it - only a few episodes later he is touched to see her happy. But that makes what he does no less real.

His encouragement alley beating is real, too. Buffy’s a big girl and Spike doesn’t force her to do anything, but he encourages her. He lets her. He wants her to beat him, because the more horrible she is, the more ashamed she feels, and the more (from his perspective at the time) she is under his power.

Ruby comes at it more deliberately. She doesn't want love. She wants control over Sam in order to achieve her goals. While she may have enjoyed having sex with Sam, I think she initiates sex in order to have power. Dean’s “banging monsters” comment in Sex and Violence underlines Sam’s very real and very legit reasons for being ashamed of having sex with Ruby, for not wanting Dean - or Bobby, for that matter - to know.

While Spike wants Buffy’s friends to know the truth, Ruby initiates the lie to Dean, in such a way that continuing the lie is the path of least resistance to Sam. Later, she encourages Sam to tell Dean the truth, but she’s already set it up. They’re co-conspirators. Telling Dean the truth would be admitting that minutes after Dean walked into the door from Hell Sam lied to his face about something pretty significant. In that moment, when Ruby wondered if Dean was Sam’s lover, Sam chose Ruby. “He’s my brother,” he said, and in some ways, he really did choose a demon over his own brother.
itsnotmymind: (buffy & faith)
...but I just finished rewatching Bad Girls, and OMG, the way Faith pauses after declaring the she doesn't care about Finch's death to make sure she takes in the look of horror on Buffy's face. In some ways she loves playing the bad girl to Buffy's good girl.

Also, for people who say Buffy was all about condemning Faith, note this line: "Getting rid of the evidence doesn't make the problem go away." She says "problem" not "crime".

Also, ugh. I made a post awhile back about the good slayer/bad slayer dynamic, focusing on Faith's point view. I really want to write about Buffy's perspective - and a phenomenon I've seen with real people that I've dubbed "The Good Girl Con" (although I do sometimes see elements of it with male people). I don't think I'm ready for that yet, though. Maybe I'll have thoughts after watching Consequences. Or maybe I have some other stuff to figure out first - we'll see.
itsnotmymind: (dean amulet)
At some point, I figure out why Buffy Summers projecting her guilt onto others in unforgiving ways makes me sympathize with her, but when Dean Winchester does it, it just makes me think he's a hypocritical asshole. I think Buffy is ultimately more forgiving to others and harsher on herself, which helps.
itsnotmymind: (buffy & faith)
I have been doing a Faith rewatch of Buffy the Vampire Slayer (and Angel the Series). I've just finished Revelations, and have thoughts:

1. Gwendolyn Post is really cool. And so good for Faith! I kind of wish she had been for real, even if it would have complicated evil Faith arc and left us Wesley-less.

2. I'm not quite sold on Buffy and Faith's buddy/buddy relationship. They were starting to hit it off at the end of Faith, Hope, and Tricks, but the "we're dating" joke and how casually comfortable they are with each other still seems a little out of the blue.

3. I don't want to hate on other people's ships, but Buffy/Angel still have anti-chemistry to me (until the Yoko Factor and after - then I like their dynamic as exes).

4. Note that Faith responds positively to the idea of her watcher being very bossy. Faith-the-rebel secretly craves order. I wonder what her first watcher was like.

5. I 100% understand why Faith turned down Buffy's offer of friendship at the end. When Faith pushed Buffy for information about Angel early on, Buffy turned her down. Buffy has spent much of their friendships keeping Angel's survival a secret. Faith has lied to Buffy, too, (hello, Kakistos!), but that doesn't change the fact that Buffy's offer of friendship is one-sided. Faith trusts Buffy. Buffy doesn't trust Faith.

6. I'm okay with the clothing fluke. It's silly, but it's okay. Guilt-ridden Willow is entertaining, anyway.

7. I am 100% on the Scoobies' side during their confrontation with Buffy. She wronged them deeply, especially Giles. Xander, on the other hand, crossed a line in telling all to Faith and encouraging her to kill Angel. Angel's death should not have been his decision. Faith should not have found out like that.
itsnotmymind: (willow & xander)
Both Buffy season six and Supernatural season five end with season finale where a character saves the day by reminding another character that they love them. However, while even just reading the transcripts of Buffy S6 can make me cry, the S5 finale leaves me cold, and it part of why S5 is my least favorite SPN season (bearing in mind that I have only seen through S10).

There are certainly some parallels, and I wonder if the SPN writers were thinking of Buffy S6 when they wrote Swan Song. If so, they left out all the parts that made Grave actually good.

You're going to stop me by telling me you love me? )
itsnotmymind: (gadreel)
TV shows the give me feelings of visceral horror:

Jessica Jones is really, really, the worst in terms of a single character. Torchwood Children of Earth is also very awful, but it’s the whole situation rather than what’s happening to one character that really gets to me. One of the most horrifying moments of Jessica Jones, to me, is when Kilgrave tells her he’ll leave Malcolm alone if she sends him pictures herself. Somehow the fact that he’s asking for selfies, not nudes, just makes it creepier. He has this much control over her, and she has no real choice but to go along with it. And if she doesn’t do it at the right time, he gives implied threats.

Two others that I find very horrifying are Sam Winchester (in Supernatural seasons 3, 4, parts of 5, and the first half of 7, specifically), and Drusilla from Buffy. Drusilla’s situation is more horrifying than Sam’s, but Sam’s is visceral for me as much if not more because he’s a protagonist and we get a stronger sense of his experiences, and also because I love him more.

There’s really no redeeming factor to Dru’s story. People have tried to find it. I've heard argued that the redeeming factor of Drusilla’s story is that she is happy, when Angel gave her eternal life in order to punish her forever. That may be true, but it seems very, very tiny considering that she has become the very “evil thing” that she was desperate to avoid. Another fan, after pointing out accurately that Dru can’t be a survivor because she’d dead, argued that Dru was…I don’t remember her exact wording, but because Dru just existed. Continued. She remains Drusilla.

Except she wasn’t always Drusilla. We don’t know her human name, but if it was Drusilla I’ll eat my hats. Whoever that girl was, perhaps she wasn’t completely and utterly destroyed, she does still exist as that monster, but she was transformed into the thing she least wanted to be. There is no redemption for her.

And that’s horrifying.

And yet...maybe those fans aren't so wrong. Drusilla is dead, to be sure - but also not. She still exists. She’s not miserable. Angel has turned her into what he wanted her to be. He made her, he designed her. She was, indeed, his art.
But she’s not…she’s not forced, not anymore. She makes her own decisions. “I could pick the wisest and bravest knight in all the land - and make him mine forever with a kiss.” And she does.

She’s insane. Angel and Darla made her insane. They took her sanity and they made her a monster - but they don’t control her. She’s not a prisoner. She’s a very different being now, she’s the “thing” she didn’t want to be. What happened to her was not her choice. As others have pointed out, Dru is the only one of the fanged four who does not get some form of redemption…because she does not need redemption. She’s a victim. An eternal victim.

Dru is a monster, but she is a monster who makes her own decisions about what to do. Angel and Darla can’t, for example, keep her from vamping Darla again. She’s the monster, now, and they are the victims. Dru is out of her mind, but her insanity is hers. She has visions and she says things that make no sense and Angel and Darla can never understand. She’s a Cassandra who has no desire to be understood. She loves. She loves “quite well. If not wisely.” She’s not the young woman who begged Angel to help her be good. And yet…"In the end, we all are who we are, no matter how much we may appear to have changed." Drusilla is her own being, her own independent agent.

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